Journey to Utopia
by Hyrule
Summary: How will Link suvive without a faerie? Is the Deku Tree a fake? Link goes on an adventure that will surely blow you away!
1. Lon Lon Ranch

On the last addition to this story, Link faced challenges throughout his quest to meet the "supposed" Deku Tree. Yet he didn't realize The Deku Tree was dead and his brother took his place. Zelda the princess of Hyrule came to the rescue of Link and teleported him to Zora's Domain. One of the most beautiful places in Hyrule! The waterfalls flowing gently as the fresh air breezes with glee. Link enjoys his stay not knowing he will have to face more terrors.  
  
Link: Hmmm. How will I start making my stay here worthwhile? Maybe I could experience these weapons. *grabs sling shot* Heh. *shoots a tree* Awesome effect!  
  
Zelda: I see you are enjoying your stay.  
  
Link: Pretty good I guess. Though I'm more interested in this sling shot!  
  
Zelda: Would you care to hear a few thoughts of mine?  
  
Link: Sure as long as it doesn't involve me getting up.  
  
Zelda: Right then.*sits down* Well lately I've been having dreams.  
  
Link: Big whoop! Everyone has dreams!*rolls eyes* God how lame are you?  
  
Zelda: LISTEN!! Well in the dreams I've been seeing things. Things that show the future. And I had one dream which involved Hyrule being destroyed by him.*points out window*  
  
Link: Him? Lmao! That is so gay! What can he do?  
  
Zelda: Many things.things unknown to us. Please help. Kick his fat ass today.now!  
  
Link agreed on killing "him" because it involved money. So he got changed and started to follow "him". Forest to lake. River to Sewers. Finally they landed in a place known as Lut Gholien. A place which has been deserted for many years due to drought or starvation.  
  
Link: Aim, Ready, FIRE!  
  
Him: Huh? *turns around* What the. *gets hit by a Deku Nut* Link: Bulls Eye! Hehe now I shall finish you off faggot! *slashes him with sword*  
  
Him: Ahhhhhhhhhhhh! *dies*  
  
Link: Green blood? *turns around*  
  
Real Him: *maniacal laugh* And please I have a name! It is Gannondorf!  
  
Link: *cracks up* Tsk tsk tsk tsk! I guess you'll have to die as well! *sword backfires* *screams in pain*  
  
Gannondorf: I'm gay ehh? Well that's right! Literally.you shall die for explaining that to other people!  
  
Link: It was a joke.what a bitch! Can't take a joke for an answer.  
  
Gannondorf: Grrr you make me want a hotdog real bad! *drools*  
  
Link: *raises eyebrow* Umm right then! Oooo look hotdog stand!  
  
Gannondorf: Where?  
  
Link: There!? *points to bush*  
  
Gannondorf: Ohhh I'll be right back! Don't move a muscle!  
  
Link: *runs with blood streaming out of him like a waterfall* SHITakemushrooms!  
  
Gannondorf: Hey?! There's no hotdog.COME BACK YOU FOOL!  
  
Link: Never.  
  
Link ends up running as fast as a German Shepherd a.k.a dog! He "flied like a fool" (technacliy) and went back to Zora's Domain with Gannondorf close on his tail! Entering a powerful force that evil despises, Link once agains saves his ass! As he went into his home he noticed a navy note on his bedside. It read:  
  
Dear Link  
  
I Zelda have gone to Lon Lon Ranch to meet Talon and his daughter Malon. I will be back soon! - Zelda  
  
Link: Lon Lon Ranch? *snickers* Talon! Lol that's hilarious! What kind of name is that?! Oooo more note!  
  
And Link, Lon Lon Ranch is located across The Market, besideKokiri Forest. I believe that is your home town! Well it was. Watch out at night time. You will be facing the Skeletons of doom! - Zelda  
  
Link: *gulp* Well it's almost night so I will go tomorrow!  
  
He went to bed and woke up at around 7:00am! He started off to Lon Lon Ranch and met up with Malon, the owners daughter!  
  
Link: Hhheeelllooo?  
  
Malon: *silently giggles* My name is Malon as you might have known. This is my horse Epona! Beautiful isn't she!  
  
Link: *looks up* Uh Huh! So can I ride her?  
  
Malon: Nope.not yet! Hear that song?  
  
Link: Yes. *notices a catchy rhythm* What about it?  
  
Malon: Well.Ohh? You don't have the Ocarina! ZELDA!  
  
Zelda: *appears out of nowhere* Yes Malon?  
  
Malon: You didn't give him the Ocarina.  
  
Zelda: Ohh yes sorry Link. I almost forgot about that! This is the ocarina!*shows Link something that looks like a shell* It is now yours to keep. Throughout this journey you will learn songs and you will be able to play them and get money or it will help you confuse animals and people!  
  
Link: Woah! Wicked shell!  
  
Zelda & Malon: OCARINA!  
  
Link: *blushes* *whispers* Ocarina.  
  
Malon: *hands over sheet of paper* Study this and once you know it by heart you can ride Epona!  
  
Epona: Niegh  
  
Link: *laughs* Well I think I got it. *plays Epona's song by heart*  
  
Malon: Quick learner! Well here yah go!  
  
Epona respects Link for his talent and allows Link to ride his back. Now horses are speedy so Link felt the breeze smoothly, rushing through his skin! The horses feet brushed to a stop at the straw-looking hay! As Link got off Epona he realized the ground felt hard, yet so soft! He dashed off to the barnyard and met Talon! What a drunk bastard! 


	2. Blue Flames

The Glowing Sword  
  
As you may have guess from before, Link is an unusual boy in many ways. For one he doesn't have a faerie, a Koriki trademark. For another every explanation revolves around him!  
  
Link faced many challenges previously. He's met with The Deku Tree's brother, been to Zora's Domain and Lon Lon Ranch. Currently Link is in Lon Lon Ranch helping out with milking cows.  
  
The sun brightly rose upon Lon Lon Ranch. Link and Zelda were helping around the farm. Milking cows, collecting eggs and feeding horses. Ever since Zelda gave Link the Ocarina, Link has been able to get the cows to produce more milk! How? By playing Epona's song of course!  
  
Link: Well, here it goes! *plays Epona's song*  
  
Cow: Mooooooo!  
  
Zelda: *laughs* *ahem* Sorry I just find the oddest things funny.  
  
Link: Suits your personality!  
  
Zelda: I'm not odd, I'm gifted! Shit! I forgot to tell you! At 2:00 we are going to The Marketplace!  
  
Link: Jeez! It's already 1:00! Zelda.  
  
Link put his Ocarina in his pocket. Got up and started to pack his belongings. ½ an hour past as Link packed his bags. As a token of appreciation Talon gave them each a bottle of milk.Lon Lon Ranch Milk is known to heal you when you are injured!  
  
Talon: This is Lon Lon Ranch Milk. It heals you when injured.  
  
Zelda: Why thanks a lot! You're so nice.  
  
Link: Well thanks and all but you're so gay! Jeez, you're always asleep leaving us to work!  
  
Zelda: *whispers* Appreciate the fact we get free milk!  
  
Link: Though it was a great pleasure milking that cow over there! *points to cow* Talon: Tsk, Tsk, Tsk, Tsk! Trying to get free food ehh? Well it won't work! *glares* I'm disappointed! *takes bottles*  
  
Link: That's it! I've had enough of your silly business! *kills chicken*  
  
Malon: How dare you kill "the chicken"! *tackles Link*  
  
Talon: Grrr. Well Zelda.Zelda? *looks back finding Zelda helping Link*  
  
Link: *gets up* That outta do for now!  
  
Zelda: *looks at the tied up Malon* Ha! Good job Link!  
  
Talon: That's enough!  
  
Link: *takes out sword* Give us a horse to ride on.NOW!  
  
Talon: Okay! Take these two horses!  
  
Talon gave Link and Zelda two horses.each fully grown! They took their luggage and rode off to the Marketplace. There they bought:  
  
Better Shields Deku Nuts Deku Seeds Bombs  
  
Link noticed a note placed on the edge of a mask store.  
  
Dear, Customer  
  
This is soon going to be a fine mask shop! Wait a while and you will  
receive masks. Sell them to people and you will receive money.give the  
money to me and you will be happy forever ^^!  
  
From, Shop  
Manager  
  
Link got over excited so him and Zelda stayed a while and waited for  
the shop to open. It finally did and Link bought himself a mask! Talking  
to everybody thinking he could sell it. As he reached the last person,  
she interested him the most. She owned chickens yet she is allergic to  
them! This puzzled Link but he decided to help the lady. Bringing back  
all 7 Chickens, Link received a bottle from the lady! The more the  
merrier! Link: Yahoo! I just got a free bottle so I can put Milk in it!  
  
Zelda: Whoop! Hey look.an alleyway!  
  
Link spotted the alleyway as well and they decided to go check it out. There seemed to be a locked door! Suddenly Link felt a hand grip his shoulder real hard!  
  
Link: Ouch what was that.?  
  
The person grabbed his and Zelda's mouths shut so they could barley talk! They entered a pitch black room, which got lighter as the person switched the lights on!  
  
Link: Who are you? What do you want with us?  
  
Person: Well my name is Osirus. I am a messenger. Do you want to go to the castle safely?  
  
Zelda: Yes Osirus. We do. I am Zelda the princess.my guards have betrayed me, for I have left and Ganondorf has taken over!  
  
Osirus: Well I've been in and out of that castle many times. It's very easy. I will guide you there! Once you get inside you can capture Ganondorf and kill him!  
  
Zelda: How though?  
  
Osirus: Well I've been eavesdropping on their conversations and apparently Ganondorf is scared of you and Link. The security system has gotten higher so you must be extra careful!  
  
Link: YOU KNOW MY NAME!  
  
Zelda: Shut the fuck up!  
  
Osirus: Shhh! These are the procedures! Follow them carefully.though I will guide you, you still have to know how to get in! First, we climb up the vines and jump off the gate top! Then we go half way up the hill and start walking sideways a bit. Then we go fully up and run straight! There will be a rock wall. We have to climb up it, swim straight and then into the corner where it is slanted. Then we will keep on walking. The boxes have been pushed in a certain way so we can go through the pipes.  
  
Zelda: Wow! You know more then I do! Osirus: *blushes* There are 5 stages of guards which we have to get past. Once we get past them we are at your throne Zelda. There Ganondorf will be sitting.standing who knows! There you and Link will use your swords and fight him.I will use my slingshot and guard the gates so the guards can't come!  
  
Link: How do we get past the guards?  
  
Osirus: Well first we will study their guarding paths and go accordingly!  
  
Zelda: Well let's get going then!  
  
Osirus: Not so fast missy! It's better to go at night. That way they won't be able to see us as well.might think we are guards! *kicks box in front of him* *takes out rusted armor* This is the armor we will be wearing.  
  
Link: Hell no! Mine is way cleaner and better!  
  
Zelda: *eyes widen* Umm well no comment.  
  
Osirus: Listen to me. This armor may look rusted but it's the same armor the guards wear. That way if they happen to notice us we will look like them. I managed to find out some secret info. They have a little system where they talk another language. We have to study it *hands out paper* and these questions so if they ask us we will know! Understood?  
  
Link & Zelda: Yes.  
  
Osirus: Good job! *stares at sky* It's almost time! Study it fast.I will be quizzing you to see if you studied it properly.if not you will keep studying until you get it!  
  
Zelda: Right then! Shut up so we can fag!  
  
Link: *studies paper*  
  
Time flew by as Link and Zelda studied. They took the test and passed! (yea) So off they went with Osirus following his directions. Once they got passed the 5 stages of guards they reached Zelda's Throne. Ganondorf wasn't there. To their surprise Ganondorf appeared behind them!  
  
Ganondorf: I've been expecting your presence.  
  
Link: Quit the crap! Now that I'm not alone you're bound to loose!  
  
Link turned to Osirus thinking that he might have been on Ganondorf's side all along! He attacked Osirus, and Zelda assumed that was her queue to fight Ganondorf! Soon Osirus passed on.he died. Guards were coming from secret passageways to help Ganondorf. Failing as Link either slashed them, used his sling shot, or stun them! As the guards stop appearing Link helped Zelda fight off Ganondorf! His sword started to glow blue. Blue Flames? Link slashed Ganondorf at his side and watched as he slowly died. Turning his back to help Zelda up, Link heard something hollow.Ganondorf resurrecting? A huge monster like creature appeared bringing down the roof! Link fell back, scared of this creature!  
  
.. 


	3. Meet Ganon

As Link came face to face with this creature known as Ganon. Link realizes soon enough that Ganondorf had summoned the Triforce of Power to become Ganon. A powerful creature with 2 huge swords!  
  
Link: Woah! Your one big monkey!  
  
Ganon: I'm not a monkey I'm a chimp!  
  
Link: Ohh yea man!  
  
Zelda: o__O  
  
Ganon: Please let me talk! I have summoned The Triforce of Power to become this magnificent creature! With these 2 swords I can slash your brain in half Link!  
  
Zelda: What's left of it anyways!  
  
Link: Correct!  
  
Ganondorf: Jeez! Let me finish! That sword that is "glowing blue" is the Master Sword! Only those who have collected the 3 spiritual stones can get a hold of it! Now I will soon posses it! *swipes master sword of of Link's hands* Mwahahaha!  
  
Link: Noooooooo! Give it back! *throws a tantrum*  
  
Ganondorf: Never! *creates a fence of fire* *throws sword on the other side* Mwahahahaha!  
  
Link: Nooooooo!  
  
Ganondorf: *tries to slash Link but fails because Link jumps over*  
  
Zelda: Ooooo! Skip rope! Let me join in! *joins in*  
  
Ganondorf: Grrr!  
  
Link: *stuns him* *goes through legs*  
  
Link: *holds up scissors* Your tail needs some clipping! *clips tail*  
  
The Fire Barrier drops. Link receives his sword and does the same process! Though he doesn't quite clip his tail o__O! Finally Ganondorf dropped to the ground trying to get up. But couldn't. For Zelda was preventing him from doing so with something she calls "Magic"  
  
Link: Hehe HAHAHAHA!  
  
Zelda: *giggle*  
  
Links delivers the final blow at his head and Ganondorf dies.for now that is! Mwahaha! Link and Zelda get out of her castle and everything is normal once again! Hyrule looks as good as ever! Saria ends up hating Mido (the guy who guards the gate) ^^! Like I said. All is well! Home sweet home! 


End file.
